Harris Greenberg*, 16-year-old: First I thought I’d make a Tumblr, get 10,000 followers and try to convince them to give me money on Kickstarter. Then I saw that fucking Hipster Puppies book and figured, why not go straight to the big boys?
Rupert Vanderslice, Art Director: Animals in trees are always a big hit for us. For 2012, we really wanted to shake things up. Goats! Right? You never see goats in trees.
Tom Williams, Farmer: We’ve been having a pretty rough year out here, frankly. When we got the phone call, we were going to say no until they mentioned the check.
Rupert Vanderslice: Logistically, it wasn’t our easiest shoot. The goats thought they were on America’s Next Top Model.
Tom Williams: They just don’t belong in trees. They weren’t happy about the crane at all.
Suzanne Smith, PETA: We can’t say we endorse this type of project. But the animals were treated humanely during the shoot and I’m pleased we were able to supervise.
Tom Williams: Freddie and Ted were a little skittish for the first couple days, but they’re doing fine now. My wife won’t look at the photos. She says it’s made us a laughingstock at church, but I said, Margaret, would the Lord want us to go hungry this winter?
Harris Greenberg: I’m going to buy a new iPad. I can’t believe they fucking made it. Everybody I know uses Google Calendar.
*all names and dialogue completely fictitious